2008 Woodie Awards
Bringing Sexy Back
Amber Chemam
Issue date: 10/30/07 Section: Opinion
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Halloween has always held a special place in my heart.
The chilly weather, AMC's horror movie marathon and bite-size candy everywhere make the season thoroughly enjoyable. I even secretly enjoy the dressing up part. As much as I might claim to despise it, there is something liberating about the opportunity to be anything you want to be, even for one night.
There is, however, one thing that I truly cannot stand about the holiday. And, trust me, I know that I will probably sound like a hypocrite saying this because I, too, have been guilty of the abhorrent act of which I am about to speak. (Just please don't remind me.)
I will never understand why it is that even the most intelligent, well-styled, socially conservative women use Halloween as an excuse to wear the skimpiest, most ridiculous-looking outfits in public, even in weather that is generally quite chilly. It's the first cold front of the year in Houston: don't act like you're not cold.
I also do not understand why, rather than hiding behind a theme, these normally smart and pulled-together women don't do the smart thing and just walk outside in their underwear. Underwear with a theme is still underwear.
Walking into a costume store is always the most aggravating experience. I can hardly stand hearing the aisles full of girls debating whether they should e a sexy cop, a sexy mechanic or a sexy Virgin Mary. I mean, really: can't we draw the line somewhere?
A few years ago, during a trip to Party Boy, I saw one of the most outrageous costumes I'd ever seen on the Sexy Aisle. This one consisted of a long blond wig, stuffed Chihuahua and tiny pink dress: the Sexy Heiress costume. I felt a little sick inside upon realizing that Paris Hilton has now been immortalized in dress-up form.
The next year, I returned for more shock and dismay to find that the new and improved 2006 Sexy Aisle included a Sexy Barista costume, complete with a green cap and apron and a name tag that read "Hello, my name is Sexy." My young and disgruntled friends that work at Starbucks were all equally disgusted that people are now paying $39.99 to look like they work at the world's biggest corporate coffee shop.
The chilly weather, AMC's horror movie marathon and bite-size candy everywhere make the season thoroughly enjoyable. I even secretly enjoy the dressing up part. As much as I might claim to despise it, there is something liberating about the opportunity to be anything you want to be, even for one night.
There is, however, one thing that I truly cannot stand about the holiday. And, trust me, I know that I will probably sound like a hypocrite saying this because I, too, have been guilty of the abhorrent act of which I am about to speak. (Just please don't remind me.)
I will never understand why it is that even the most intelligent, well-styled, socially conservative women use Halloween as an excuse to wear the skimpiest, most ridiculous-looking outfits in public, even in weather that is generally quite chilly. It's the first cold front of the year in Houston: don't act like you're not cold.
I also do not understand why, rather than hiding behind a theme, these normally smart and pulled-together women don't do the smart thing and just walk outside in their underwear. Underwear with a theme is still underwear.
Walking into a costume store is always the most aggravating experience. I can hardly stand hearing the aisles full of girls debating whether they should e a sexy cop, a sexy mechanic or a sexy Virgin Mary. I mean, really: can't we draw the line somewhere?
A few years ago, during a trip to Party Boy, I saw one of the most outrageous costumes I'd ever seen on the Sexy Aisle. This one consisted of a long blond wig, stuffed Chihuahua and tiny pink dress: the Sexy Heiress costume. I felt a little sick inside upon realizing that Paris Hilton has now been immortalized in dress-up form.
The next year, I returned for more shock and dismay to find that the new and improved 2006 Sexy Aisle included a Sexy Barista costume, complete with a green cap and apron and a name tag that read "Hello, my name is Sexy." My young and disgruntled friends that work at Starbucks were all equally disgusted that people are now paying $39.99 to look like they work at the world's biggest corporate coffee shop.